Looking at photos of John Dillinger, he looked every bit as smug as he was.  He was a textbook definition of confidence, guts, and cajones.  There was nothing John Dillinger was afraid of, and this man without fear helped to inspire the FBI and define the word gangster.

It was a time when people didn’t have money and banks did.  He wasn’t so much a criminal as he was a folk hero.  Though he missed the ‘give to the poor’ part, people still got a big kick out of him robbing from the rich.

Catching such a man was not an easy task.  J. Edgar Hoover, then a younger man, was intent on changing the face of law enforcement.  He would be integral in founding the FBI and the whole concept of cross-state federal crime.  He was obsessed with bringing down criminals, and none more than public enemy #1 — John Dillinger.

Add to this a dogged FBI agent by the name of Melvin Purvis who was charged with bringing Dillinger down, and we have an intriguing story of cops and robbers in its truest sense.  After eventually bringing Dillinger down, Melvin Purvis ended up committing suicide many years later.  Such games are not for the weak.

With this sort of classic story filled with equal parts history and seeming fantasy, some of the best actors of our day, and a prime opening spot on the 4th of July, how could a filmmaker screw this up?

After seeing Public Enemies, that question can be answered.  Michael Mann seems to have gotten so caught up in his period costumes that he forgot what was at the center of the real story — characters.

Johnny Depp does as well as can be expected, but we never really get to know John Dillinger.  That could be excused if we instead got to know Melvin Purvis or J. Edgar Hoover, but those are also both untouchable, distant and hard to understand.

If not the characters, then at least the story of a depression era gangster as the last of a dying breed before the g-men came in and cleaned up America could have been utilized,  but even that is distant and difficult to connect with.

For all of John Dillinger’s charm, Mann seems unable to give us a consistent vantage point from which to view the goings on.  It is foolish to ignore the heart of your character when everyone knows how the movie is going to end.

Either Dillinger should have been played the martyr or the evil criminal, but instead we straddle the line between wanting to like him and knowing he doesn’t deserve to live.  He’s clearly more upstanding than many of his criminal counterparts, but that’s not saying much.

Purvis, who managed to accomplish what seemed to be impossible, could have been painted as a pinnacle of American ingenuity.  Crime-fighting was transforming.  It was a time when the FBI realized that they couldn’t fight crime with guns — they had to use their heads.

We do get brief mentions of how Purvis masterfully used forensics and tracking to catch his prey — something near revolutionary at the time — but it doesn’t get the attention it deserves.  Purvis finally caught up with John Dillinger not by outgunning him, but by outsmarting him.

Overall, I give this movie credit for inspiring me to read more about John Dillinger, Melvin Purvis, and the formation of the FBI.  I admire movies that can turn me into a history-reading nut for a few days.

But sadly, I probably would have gotten more out of an hour long documentary on the subject.  Johnny Depp and Christian Bale are underused and deserve the attention that their iconic characters deserve.

This movie wants to be so very good.  The set pieces are good, the movie takes you back to the 30s.  But for all the beauty, Mann just couldn’t manage to bring the movie into focus.

Verdict: C+ Tilt: B

Public Service Announcement: The man on the right is not Michael Bay.

Though he has been posing as him for many years, recent evidence suggests that Michael Bay is really a 13-year-old boy who has hired the man on the right as his frontman.

Either that, or the guy on the right is Michael Bay and said man is really a 13-year-old boy who got a little frisky with a Zoltar machine on the Jersey shore.  Either way, that man is a 13-year-old boy.

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s talk about Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.  I have a feeling that this may end up being a rant about Michael Bay, so I’m going to sum up the movie first to save some time.

Megan Fox is hot.  The Beef is charismatic.  Josh Duhamel is dreamy.  Transforming robots are cool.  Michael Bay is dumb.

Seriously; that should go on the cover of the DVD.  I hereby issue permission to Hasbro to use that blurb on any of their future Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen marketing materials.

The problem with this movie is that there should be no problem with this movie.  It has all of the ingredients of perfection — it should be the pinnacle of modern day big-budget action movie-making.

It has a male lead who is funny, lovable, and charismatic.  It has a female lead with a face who could launch far more than a 1000 ships.  It has transforming robots brought to life by some of the best CG the world has ever seen.

It is relevant to today’s interests with 80s freaks now making the money and technology being the center of our lives.  It has explosions, exotic locales, and the potential to be really funny.

But the problem is that it is helmed by a 13-year-old boy who still thinks that dogs humping is the funniest thing on earth.  I’m really quite surprised we didn’t see a few kicks to the groin, because that’s always good for a laugh as well.

Seriously, is there no one in Michael Bay’s editing room that has the cajones to stand up and say, “Um, Mr. Bay, don’t you think 3 dog-humping scenes it taking it a little too far?”

I can only assume that someone associated with the film has the good sense to voice that opinion, and then I can only imagine that through tears of laughter Mr. Bay dismissed the critique because he is Michael Bay and I’m pretty sure he has decided that he is God.

I’m going to give Orci and Kurtzman the benefit of the doubt, and assume that Michael Bay desecrated what was probably a reasonably serviceable script given the subject matter.  And I’m going to give Steven Spielberg the benefit of the doubt and assume that he was somehow out of contact with civilization when this film was being edited.

Lest you think that I’m just anti-dog-humping, I want to make it clear that it is not specifically the dog-humping that is the problem.  It is that an otherwise awesome movie is burdened by the non-funny site gags and gross humor, some of which borders on obscene and/or rascist.

I have defended Michael Bay in the past, and I think his body of work clearly has flashes of brilliance.  Even this movie has a few of those moments.  But overall, the movie feels like that instead of movie by comittee (which I may have preferred in this case), it is a movie brought to you by one man who is wildly out of touch with reality.

It makes a great GM commercial, and an even better PSA for the US Military, and after seeing Megan Fox stay hot through numerous desert explosions I’m sure they can sell her make-up by the ton.

The movie is cool.  It really is.  The robots are slick.  Optimus Prime still has that chilling authority, and Starscream and Megatron are more interesting this time around.

Omitted from the first one, it is inspired to see Soundwave re-imagined as a satellite, even able to shoot little animal transformers to earth.  It is the Soundwave for today’s technology, and I’m glad they didn’t try to fit a walkman into the film.

Some reviewers have complained about the robots being too plentiful to differentiate from each other, but I had no such problem.  I could keep the robots straight, but I was disappointed to see some of them receive so little screen time (Ratchet, Arcee) and others receive far too much (the Twins; and by too much I mean any screen time at all).

Ratchet was especially perplexing because I think they literally forgot him until about halfway through the movie.  Ironhide was given a fair amount of attention, but Ratchet would just show up from time to time, and he was often absent in shots that you would expect him to be in.

This franchise isn’t dead, but this wasn’t a step forward.  The next movie needs to get back to the characters.  We need to learn more about the Transformers that matter and less about the ones that don’t.  Also, John Turturro needs to be let go.  Sorry man, you’re not funny.

I’m really conflicted about this movie because there are a lot of great things about it, but it is ruined by Michael Bay’s immaturity and lack of editing.  I hope that Spielberg cracks the whip and reigns Bay in for the next outing or else this giant robot franchise is going to end up at the bottom of the Laurentian Abyss.

Verdict: D- Tilt: C+

So up here in Northern Virginia, we don’t have Sonic.  I wish we did, but we don’t.  The entire population of Northern Virginia is worse off for it, littered with mindless zombies who think a burger is defined by McDonald’s (I’m looking at you, Rob).

(Apparenly this greatly offends both Rob and Northern Virginians… for the record I was referring to fast food hamburgers, which I do not consider five guys to strictly be as there is no drive thru).

Northern Virginians don’t know the joy of foot-long coneys, or cherry limeades, or tator tots.  Tator tots are the absolute pinnacle of potato creations, by the way.  Don’t let anyone tell you any differently.

Whenever my wife and I travel to Texas (or anywhere south of Northern Virginia), we always find a Sonic.  Some trips are not only accentuated by such visits, but defined by them.  I don’t remember much else about our Outer Banks trip except unswimmable typhoons and Sonic (now with Seagulls!).

One of Sonic’s grander creations is the Toaster.  You’d think it wouldn’t be that special, but there’s something about a burger on Texas Toast that really makes it all the sweeter.

I’m going to go out on a limb and venture a guess that it’s the butter that makes it better.  Butter, like cheese, tends to make just about everything better.

Recently, I got the bright idea of creating Toasters at home.  How hard could it be?  You make a grilled cheese sans cheese, grill some burgers and you’re good to go, right?

Absolutely right!  We made some last night and they were exquisite.  To add to the Sonic vibe, we even fried some tator tots and melted some colby jack on top of them.

I know what you’re thinking, “Come on, Lykaon, you can’t full me.  It’s just a burger on bread instead of a bun.  It’s the same thing.”

But it is not the same thing.  It is something far more heavenly.  I am only sad that I can’t have these creations more often, prepared for me lovingly by some Sonic worker on roller skates.  Well, I guess the kitchen staff doesn’t wear roller skates, but I like to imagine that they do.

So, if you want to spice up your burgers, do something nice for yourself.  Make some Texas Toast and use that instead of a bun.  I promise your burger’s taste will increase manyfold.

So the movie watching this summer hasn’t been going to well.  I’ve been busy, and have thus missed some movies.  My desire to make up for lost time is diminished from some pretty lousy reviews for the likes of Terminator: Salvation and Land of the Lost.

But this weekend I took the opportunity to watch a week-early sneak peak of The Proposal starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds.

Wait.  Who’s Sandra Bullock?  Oh right — she’s that chick from Speed.  It’s been a while since we’ve seen Bullock in a movie that anyone has watched, but she’s back to her roots for this film.

I’m not usually shy about admitting my man crushes, so I won’t pull punches here.  I wanted to watch The Proposal primarily because Ryan Reynolds is one of the more charismatic actors to come around in some time.  He’s remarkably adept at being both comedic and serious at the same time.

The movie also has a great supporting cast in the likes of Coach Craig T. Nelson, Betty White, and Mary Steenburgen.  Oh yah, and that chick from Watchmen; not nearly as sexy here in normal clothing.

The Proposal is a romantic comedy.  There aren’t any explosions, none of the characters wear spandex, and the plot is about as predictable as 90-degree weather in Texas.  There’s nothing new in this movie, but there is something old.  And that is perhaps it’s greatest charm.

And by old I am not making a crack about Sandra Bullock’s age (though she is 12 years Reynolds’ senior).  Instead, I’m referring to the vibe of the film.  Hollywood has forgotten how to make simple films in the last few years, and it’s good to see one crop up that has that old-school romantic comedy vibe.

It has been said that there are a discrete set of stories in the world, and thus Hollywood will always struggle to be original.  But The Proposal proves that you don’t have to be original — you just have to be likable, witty, and full of charismatic characters.

Ryan Reynolds does an amazing job offering support to the other actors on screen.  Though he is by all rights as big of a draw to the movie as Sandra Bullock, he understands his role and provides support on screen rather than stealing screen time.

I was a bit wary about the age difference between the leads being unbelievable, but it doesn’t affect the film at all and one would be hard pressed to detect the difference.  Bullock looks possibly better than ever at 45, as she proudly shows in some not-quite-nude scenes (it is PG-13 afterall).

There’s a convoluted plot in there somehow about how Bullock is the demon boss from hell, and Ryan Reynolds is her lowly assistant.  There’s some family strife for Reynolds whose father would prefer him to take over the family business.  There’s some psychological scarring for Bullock’s character to overcome.

But at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter.  What matters is that they fall in love and live happily ever after as any couple should.  There’s never really any suspense about that, but the journey is the prize.

The one area of suspense comes from the Immigration officer intent on proving that Reynolds’ and Bullock’s engagement is a sham.  Even by the end of the film, it’s not entirely clear whether Bullock is going to get deported or not.  The question is really whether she gets deported before true feelings can be revealed.

A special mention should go to Oscar Nuñez, who plays the local everyman for Reynolds’ hometown.  Although his role was light and unimportant, he gathered more laughs than he probably should have.

In fact, laughs were plentiful.  I don’t think I heard most of poor Mary Steenburgen’s lines because she always seemed to be the straight man to someone else’s jokes, though she does as well of a job as she ever has playing basically the same character she always does.

If you can take a break from explosions and Ferrell-style humor, The Proposal may be right up your alley.  It’s simple and low-budget compared to the costumed-vigilante set, but it’s fun and entertaining.  And isn’t that what movies are supposed to be about?

Verdict: B+ Tilt: A-

When they first announced the new Star Trek, I wasn’t enthused.  I felt sure it would be screwed up, and JJ Abrams has a pretty spotty record as far as I’m concerned.  Add that to the fact that Mr. Abrams was a professed Non-Trekker and I was a little nervous.

But when the news hit that they were moving Star Trek from a November release to a May summer tentpole release, I started to become intrigued.  I figured there must be something to the movie if Paramount felt that they could compete with supermutants and cyborgs.

The weekend finally arrived and as I sat there in the crowded theater, I realized that this was a pretty big event.  Sure, Hollywood has gone bonkers over reboots over the last few years, but this was Star Trek.  It’s practically a religion to millions of people.

And they pulled it off.  Star Trek is easily the best movie of this year, and even its successors this movie season are going to have a hard time matching its vigor.  Star Trek is the Iron Man of 2009.

I have written about time travel before on my blog so it should be come as no surprise to anyone for me to say that I absolutely hate time travel.  It almost always creates more problems than it solves, and it’s nearly impossible to properly recover from.

But I realized as I watched Star Trek that what I really hate is Back To The Future style time travel.  This concept of going back and changing the present is an impossible scenario that is bound to lead to disaster.

This Star Trek embraces a broader (and potentially more scientifically viable) approach to time travel that supports the position that there are an infinite number of timelines, all co-exisiting.  Time Travel by these means isn’t so much time traveling as it is timeline jumping.

It is the crux of this approach to time travel that makes Star Trek possible.  It is the macguffin that makes it easy to dismiss all of the inconsistencies with the original series, and the trick that makes this movie the first true reboot we’ve ever gotten.

Star Trek doesn’t destroy 40 years of Star Trek; it validates it.  While we were watching Kirk and Spock galavant around on their five-year mission, there was a different Kirk and Spock who had a completely different world to deal with.  One where Spock had even more issues to suppress, and Kirk had cause to be just a little bit crazier.

This movie so perfectly captures the spirit of Star Trek that the viewer spends almost no time pondering the differences.  It is folly to do so because the script dares you to argue with it.  It is a self-aware script that deals with inconsistencies before the viewer can even assess their impact.

But where they don’t fool you with script, they do so with acting.  The cast they have assembled to fill these classic roles is absolutely amazing.  I did not think it possible to get a set of actors who so perfectly could match their predecessors.

Although I expected to like Zachary Quinto as Spock the most, I ended up being far more impressed with Chris Pine.  He embodied Kirk without being a parody which was a tall order considering the original Kirk himself was nearly a parody.

The Kirk in this universe is a little more brazon, a little more cocky (if you can believe it), and a touch crazier.  While we always knew Kirk to be a tad on the impetuous side, this new Kirk is downright bat-crazy at some points.  He was written with a an almost Jack Sparrowesque appeal — crazy but in control; unstable but reliable.

And our new Spock isn’t quite like the old, either.  His emotions aren’t buried quite as deep, making him seem to favor his human side more than his Vulcan.  Although a departure from the original Spock, the more apparent war between his halves was an interesting addition to the film.

In fact, we see his feuding halves become the very reason that he cannot accomplish what Kirk can.  While Kirk embraces his humanity, Spock’s inability to embrace either side makes him almost a liability to the Enterprise.  This gets at the heart of the original series and makes you feel Star Trek all over again.

The writers did not hesitate to cram in all of the references they could.  If there was a catch-phrase you loved from the original series, it’s practically a guarantee that you’ll find it in this film.  From “I’m a doctor…” to “I’m givin’ her all she’s got.”, they’re all here.

Rather than take itself as the successor of a devout group of movies, Star Trek embraces the fun of the original — it was called Wagon Train to the stars for a reason.  I don’t even think Gene Roddenberry himself meant for it to carry much gravitas.

It was through this infectious approach that he was able to tackle weighty topics without being judged.  He could have interracial kisses and soviet dissertations with a wink and a smile.  It wasn’t real afterall.  It was all just science fiction make believe.

Though this movie doesn’t tackle any particularly weighty issue, what it does do is capture the essence of Star Trek.  With superb acting, a surprisingly self-aware script, and a serviceable story that opens the doors wide for a whole new Trekverse, this movie couldn’t have done much more right.

Whether you are a Trekker of old, or someone who never quite ‘got it’, this film is for you.  You will likely either find yourself happily revisiting your inner Trekker, or discovering for the first time what Trek is really all about.  Either way, it’ll be a heck of a ride.

Verdict: A Tilt: A+