With a tip off from Hemisphire and Vic over at Screen Rant, I’ve caught the rumor of Jurassic Park 4 in the works.
Jurassic Park 4? Someone should tell them that The Lost World and Jurassic Park III sucked horribly.
Also, Michael Crichton should really reign in his properties. The guy writes wonderfully detailed books, but having one of his properties run amok just makes him look the fool.
So in JP4 we can expect Laura Dern as the protagonist, and a plot involving a government initiative to train dinosaurs for warfare.
Can I get a Triceratops with a frickin’ laser beam on its head? Honestly. It’s all I ask for.
No word yet on whether Dr. Evil will make a cameo. I think he totally should. If anything is more absurd than sharks with laser beams on their heads it would have to be dinosaurs with homing missiles on their backs.
Yeah, OK, so this sounds bad, but I’ll go you one better. Last night I was skimming imdb and ended up watching a trailer for…
Alvin and the Chipmunks.
Seriously.
With Jason Lee.
Seriously
I actually saw a trailer for that before watching The Simpsons Movie.
Seems like a bad idea, and the CG looks pretty crappy. But the voices for the chipmunks were spot on.
And I have a soft spot for Jason Lee.
Still… I don’t know if I can bear to attend the theater for that one.